|17:56 - SomeTimes...|
SomeTimes I think I am not who I am... I want to do something, but I do not. Some times I wonder why I do what I do... why I give a rat's ass since it can go against what I feel is myself. Some times I wonder... sometimes I do. Some times I fart and it smells, and some times it does not. Some times I wonder what my involvement is with other humans, and some times I wonder why I just do not give in and be a big compulsive liar like the rest of the planet.
I saw T3... and I must say, it blew my pants off. I went in with expectations and only one made it through... that was the fact that Patrick was a better Terminator than his female counterpart. However, everything else exceeded, and I found myself mezmorized by the end of the movie. I recommend this movie to any T/sci-fi/Matrix/action fan.
Sex... screwing... why do I fight this natural programming? I think I fight it so much some times that I start to crave it... or maybe I crave it because I am use to having it... yet... I do not want it... I would rather do it manually... ah... programming.
Some where, programming has me procrastinate to a point of destorying many things I attempt to build up. Procrastination is some how programmed into my being. Or... maybe it is not programming. It may be a physical failure in hardware. My body... wore out before its time due to what I have and have not done to it over the years.
You know, I cut a piece of wood, and the cut stays there indefinitely. I cut myself, and the cut "magically" goes away. Cell regeneration. It is an amazing thing that so many humans take for granted. The fact the body is always healing itself. Everything minus the brain and heart... and I believe the liver, however that I do not remember.
Fear not that which I think... fear that only that I wish to actually do and do not, for that means control is no longer in my grasp.