Mar 13th, 2003
|11:44 - Brain Defect Detected|
Um... as I shut Alex's door, I heard strange bizzare bird sounds. Under a truck, I noticed that a bird was sitting on the beak of another bird, and it appeared to be attempting to crack its skull open. The attacking bird would chirp every now and them while the other bird was screaming bloody murder. The defending bird would move around, however the other attacking bird had a death grip on it. It would keep pecking and pecking at the head of the other bird as if attempting to kill it. I was sexually aroused when seeing it, despite the fact I could tell these birds were not engaging with anything sexual. I think I dislocated my brain. I feel there is something disturbingly wrong with me. If they were attempting to have sex I could understand a deep down subconscious response to sexual arousal... however... this was anything but that. I was not thinking of any females either, so I know that was not the case. I kept thinking "violence" in my mind, and realized that I was being turned on.
Maybe I should invest in being a mass murderer. Maybe death and violence turns me on. Groovy... I am going to go stand in a tub filled with water while I cook bread in a toaster in my hands and sing "Red Rubber Ball".
On a lighter note, I am going to post my family dothing bobber. It will even have my drawing that took a year to do in WordPerfect since it sucks nut sacs.
Current Mood: weird
Well... what immediately jumped into my head was video games...
Your violent catharsis. Video games give you pleasure, do they not?
I can understand why it would feel very weird to be aroused by something like this, but it's nothing out of the ordinary, really. Look at how much violence is in movies along with sex, and how there's such a connection between death and sex. Oftentimes when there's death, people have the urge to procreate to replace the dead organism. Not sure if this is also true in the animal world... but I've observed it in the human realm.
Yeah, let's not start with the toaster thingy just yet, eh?
Besides I don't think you have any bread in your pad unless I missed something completely in my search for edibles this morning that culminated in me consuming your intended breakfast. *gryn*
|Date:||May 7th, 2003 10:51 (UTC)|| |
Re: Sex and violence.
I do get your connection, however, I feel the real reason is much more deep and sick than that. The one bird was bascially on top of the other bird, pinning it down, minus the few times it had to move to wrap its claws around the others mouth. Then the one bird is making the most loud pulsating sounds. It is as if I was watching them HAVE sex. As far as I know, they could have been. I am not familiar with the bird society, and have no real clue what was going on.
Video games would work as an analogy if I got pleasure ONLY from games that are violent. There are some games that are no where close as such. Tetris, Little XI (or is that IX) and I get the same if not more pleasure from many of these games. I think it truly boils down to, I like to watch, and watch is what my mind started to say we were doing.