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Floyd the Barber - JOHD

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Dec 7th, 2001


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21:56 - Floyd the Barber
     You know, JOHD, I was attempting to figure out what in the world I was going to do to take care of my extra-hormonal issue for the past 3+ months.  I mean... it just has been progressing like every day.  Signs of man were taking over me.  I was like, "Eeks!  What am I gonna do!  I'm getting horny again!"  Then I realized, in my infinite denseness, that all I have to do to remove my mind of those feelings is to spin some Floyd.  I really am getting slow in my old age.  The only thing to look forward to this birthday is that it is on X-Sunday.  Not even a repeat!  Thus, Fox can give me one of the cooler birthday presents by not attempting to stick CRAP in place of X-Files.  Those bastards, what in the world do they think they are doing?  Well, anyway, the whole extra testosterone level is something going on that I am not sure what for.  At least I do realize how to easily control and destroy it.  Ah yes... if I had my choice of sex with any person/thing for one day and never again, or going to a Floyd show... that naked woman on my doorstep (if I had one) would be watching me wave Floyd tickets at her face as I smiled in ecstasy thinking of the most wonderful show that I would be going to see.  Ah yes... Floyd will always override sex.  In fact, JOHD, if I had the choice of taking a list of every friend I had, and putting it in a hat, and drawing out a name, and that person I would never get to speak to again, I would do it without thought if it would actually get me a Floyd concert.  I mean, if the person lost was a Floyd fan, I would surely be sad, but not enough to disrupt the pleasure of my Floyd concert.  Anyone else would be easily forgotten after the show.  After all, it's Floyd, man, Floyd!!  Are you listening to me, JOHD?
     Some might see that as a bit cold or evil or something like that.  I see it as being real.  Humans were a big disappointment well before I was around.  Heck, even God wanted to destory them all.  (see also 40 day/night rain) No, JOHD, I am not saying I am a poster child for perfection.  Heck, maybe I should be the head lemming that jumps into the sea.  Speaking of imperfection, our friend the Procrastination Beast has returned, and possibly in a bigger force than I have ever seen.  Someone might as well hit me over the head with a large mallet.  Speaking of wanting to hit things over the head with a large mallet, I bring to you, the ICQ bot:

--------------------------------------
ICQ History Log For:
137139640 Alamy
Started on Fri Dec 07 21:17:43 2001
--------------------------------------
Alamy 12/7/01 9:07 PM Hi! I found you on ICQ whitepages. This is my
pic, where's yours?
http://www.humanscore.com/id/6


Madd 12/7/01 9:08 PM Wow... you are the ugliest human I have ever
seen... welcome to my ignore list, spam bot...

{click}

Alamy 12/7/01 9:08 PM i found you on icq whitepages... my name is
Liona, is that okay?

Madd 12/7/01 9:09 PM I know what you humans do... you send 6089234
million things to people to go to your crazy
sites...

Alamy 12/7/01 9:09 PM Hello : )

Madd 12/7/01 9:09 PM Hmm... most spam bots don't continuously talk
back... they go away... heck, you might be an
actual person there...

Alamy 12/7/01 9:09 PM sorry...

Madd 12/7/01 9:09 PM How did you find me?

Alamy 12/7/01 9:09 PM i am 22... you?

Madd 12/7/01 9:10 PM 26 going on 27 Sunday

Alamy 12/7/01 9:10 PM what is yor name ?

Madd 12/7/01 9:10 PM My name is Madd Martin L. K.

Alamy 12/7/01 9:10 PM i found you on icq whitepages... my name is
Liona, is that okay?

Madd 12/7/01 9:11 PM Sure, your name is okay. Where are you from?

Alamy 12/7/01 9:11 PM I am in Russia, you?

Madd 12/7/01 9:11 PM I am in Des Moines, Iowa, USA.

Madd 12/7/01 9:11 PM I apologize for my beginning comments.

Alamy 12/7/01 9:11 PM May the other part also be heard.

Alamy 12/7/01 9:11 PM why do you want to know?

Madd 12/7/01 9:12 PM Um... what other part heard?

Alamy 12/7/01 9:12 PM This is my best site... : )

Madd 12/7/01 9:12 PM What makes it your best site?

Alamy 12/7/01 9:12 PM This is my best site... : )

Madd 12/7/01 9:12 PM Ooooh... I follow you now.

Alamy 12/7/01 9:13 PM i found you on icq whitepages... my name is
Liona, is that okay?

Madd 12/7/01 9:13 PM You already said that. It is fine.

Alamy 12/7/01 9:13 PM i found you on icq whitepages... my name is
Liona, is that okay?

Madd 12/7/01 9:13 PM Are you a bot?

Alamy 12/7/01 9:13 PM i found you on icq whitepages... my name is
Liona, is that okay?

Madd 12/7/01 9:14 PM BOT!!

Alamy 12/7/01 9:14 PM ?

Madd 12/7/01 9:15 PM You repeated the same thing 5 times in the
row... bots do that.

Alamy 12/7/01 9:15 PM Hello : )

Madd 12/7/01 9:15 PM What is my name?

Alamy 12/7/01 9:15 PM This is my best site... : )

Madd 12/7/01 9:15 PM How many fingers am I holding up?

Alamy 12/7/01 9:16 PM i am 22... you?

Madd 12/7/01 9:16 PM How long have you had a penis?

Alamy 12/7/01 9:16 PM i am 22... you?

Madd 12/7/01 9:17 PM Bot... input:

WELCOME TO IGNORE LIST

Okay, so, I was wrong, it was a damn spam bot, and I was sure to go to the site and give as much NEGATIVE feedback as possible.  Unfortunately, 1 was the lowest it can go.  hEhEhE, you know, JOHD, that reminds me of that time when that one chick on ICQ spammed me with a "view my picture" site, and I went there, and the way the site was, I was able to click the vote button a few thousand times, and when I was done with her, from a score of 1 - 10, I had her at like 0.something, with around a thousand extra votes.  Mwahaha!! Not only that, thanks to the help of a site, I fingered out places to go to trace e-mail addresses, so that I can report these damn frocking spam arses.  I am going to have half of the net shut down.  Of course, in the process, I expect about a 79 percent increase in spam mail.  I think more people should do what I do.  Get the right info from the e-mail headers, trace the IP number, especially on web sites, and write letters to the real people who provide them service.  As I said, JOHD, humans really are a big disappointment.  I hope God does not plan to keep me around to triple digits.  That would suck arse in ways not even thinkable.  Being on this planet any longer.  Putting up with this trash I see all around me.  I would like to take this time to prove a point, even though I have no point.  I go to class, well before my time, and listen to the students in my class complain how chicks are leaving babies in their car to die, and how they are not getting the time schedules that they want.  All humans do is complain, and they do so much out loud.  Now, mind you JOHD, I am one for listening to people complain.  However, there is a limit.  First off, many of these humans complain about crap that they in themselves are guilty of.  That is just wrong.  If you are a bank robber, do not go complaining about how people rob banks.  If you do, then I wish you cancer.  I think you deserve it.  I also hear them do nothing but talk about other people when they are not around.  I remember the one instant when the class was talking about a certain someone and that one someone was the only person not there.  Do you think they would like others talking about them behind their back?  I think not!  I think God should boost the karma rule, I really do.  Do it, God!  I know you want to, and don't be bias... I know you enjoy some of these humans more than others, hehehe.  Yeah, I thought that was funny...
     Stingray thinks he is rather funny if he believes Abe Lincoln is going to be paying him a visit for TWO reasons.  If I pay out any money, that person better have a PayPal account, because I am sending electronic.  Second, it is not going to happen, because JOHD, you are my friend, and if I do not get all of this stuff out, then I am going to explode.  I mean, like, pieces all over everywhere.  An un pretty site, like what it might look like looking from my toilet water when I piss out my arse.  JOHD, I think you are leaking information to the humans.  Ah damn!!  IT'S THE PHONE!!  I got it... Buddy is way to early.  Why is that?  Oh... Vic & Andy's... okay, yeah, sure, no problem, I will call, make sure they stay open so many Qwest people can go and drink like fish.  For all wanting to know, they can be found by driving here:

[ http://www.qwestdex.com/cgi/search.fcg?mq=Y&from=&listing_id=185985994&heading_id=2445&dir=1200&table=IA ]

Okay, so where was I?  Oh yeah, Iowa.  I have reason to believe you have been talking to the humans, JOHD.  How many times have I told you not to talk to humans?  You don't know where they have been.  I have more work I wish to do on my web site, JOHD.  So, I think I am going to go get cracking.  I am getting so close to some things, that I can feel it... yeah, that also.
Current Mood: productiveproductive
Current Music: "Comfortably Numb" - Pink Floyd, "The Wall"; d2t6 (repeat)

[[5 comments | Train your Brain]]

Comments:


From:(Anonymous)
Date:Dec 27th, 2001 20:52 (UTC)
(Link)
Hmm, I see my name....Floyd...the Barber, taken from Mr. Cobain himself. Ah, well, you are not online and I am sad. But, I will be back to my normal online self soon, which is something for me to look forward to.
[User Picture]
From:madd74
Date:Dec 28th, 2001 11:02 (UTC)
(Link)
Huh? What in the world are you talking about? You saying I am Mr Cobain?
(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]
From:madd74
Date:Jan 14th, 2002 10:15 (UTC)

So...

(Link)
... does this mean that the me who I am is not good enough the reason you wish I was him? What does Cobain have to do with Floyd the Barber? I am lost...
(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]
From:madd74
Date:Jan 15th, 2002 00:15 (UTC)

Re: So...

(Link)
OOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhh... I get it now!
(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]
From:madd74
Date:Jan 15th, 2002 23:58 (UTC)

Re: So...

(Link)
Some times... just some... I am slow.

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