Madd Martin L Kroeger (madd74) wrote,
Madd Martin L Kroeger
madd74

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Forgot

     I was thinking so much stuff to talk to you about that I think I forgot most of it.  Ironic how things like that work.  You know, I think about you most than anyone.  I have never had a dream about you, however, you have made more vidgame name spots than anyone I know, with the excpetion of myself.  I think that should say a lot when I think about it.  Also, here we go again.  You know, lack of ISP provisionings is no option to say that I have not been keeping up, and let me tell you the reason.  Look at the time I do have, to at least comment down to Laurel about whatever it is I wish to talk about, and I do not.  Being tired is not an option either.  There are no options at all that could or should be used.  I think it important I talk about what is mentally going on at this time.  I mean after all, JOHD, that is how you came to be.  You went from requirement to requirement.  I know, it was a big change from the one to the other.

     It is rather interesting how one can live a life when they know there is an end to it.  The only mortal concept that a mortal being can be assured of, and depend on, is death.  It is an interesting concept that as soon as you come into the world, before you have any possibility for rational thought, that a hidden backwards counter starts ticking away.  They say if humans lived forever, they would never have anything fulfilling in life.  There would be no pressure for anything, since hey, if I don't do it in this 1000 years, I can always do it in the next block, or one after that, or what have you.  I see this frame of thinking.  From my study of humans, I see where this plays a factor.  Take something like a term paper.  So many humans, putting it off at the last minute, but by default, unless they are me, they cram it all in on that last day.  I exclude me due to the fact that I have gone just not even blinking to do the paper, let alone cram for it last day.  A habit that I had fallen into, and the reason I realized I would have to take the break from it I have taken.  Of course, I may have totally overshot my bounds.  However, in 1000 years, will it matter what I did now?  I see people with the process that of course not, the body will be dead, as will many generations afterwards.  Some will come to argue into the point that there are people like Bach and Hitler and Nepoleon and this large list of people who have proven that either have already gone their rounds, or at least they shall at some point in time.  So tell me this... what does Bach care if movies, music, and everything else goes on based on his life achievements.  Last time I checked, Heaven takes no plastic, checks, or even cash.  It is a token free economy.  It may be one of the best types of systems to live in.  Let us look at society as it is known as earth humans.

     If I drive down my street, and I have no tail light, I will get pulled over.  No reason to test this theory since I already did, a few times.  Darn those Newton cops.  It is scripted some where that it is wrong, and that intervention by a reserved force is required.  What for?  These are laws, and these laws are passed down from generation to generation.  Usually, they are modified in ways to makes sense of some greater thing, but I think the grand sceme of things is lost to human perception.  There is this compelling urge to help in the strangest of ways.

     Okay, so where does this brain spark come from.  Was it the movie?  Was it the chat(s) at lunch?  Possibly, quite possibly, it is a lost connection to this Reality that I am suppose to be in.  This scripted one that states I am to go to a job, complain about it, find it horrid, but do it strictly for money.  What if I want to help?  Or better yet, what if I just want to learn?  What a good place to learn about the human condition than to get the humans where they perceieve they are most vulnerable.  Of course, I do not have to get anything.  It all flows into me.  As long as the humans feel they can squeek a wheel, someone will come attend to it.  Of course, what they do not realize is by adding fire to the grease, you may do more damage to yourself than to just let things work out.

     Do you have any clue what I am talking about?  Hmm...

     You know, I am not sure if I miss being on-line or not.  What is there to being on-line?  Anything that can be done on-line can be done in some other medium, and most likely it is less expensive.  Arrrrggg... there is that money thing again.  Nooo... must fight these pauses.  Body... mind... slipping away.  I could always cheat, bring out the largest power of them all when it comes to motivation of fatigue purging.  Of course, at the same time, one only really requires a mind that believes.  Issues... many of them... you know, I sit, drive, walk, or what have you, more times than not, and think about things to say to you.  I think I fantasize, how you are some how connected to some form of portable translator that helps me work wonders by getting the mental information to you.  I see it almost like an IV, dripping a saline salution of information to the vein of what would be you, JOHD.  Aaahhhh... not going to flight the sleep tonight.  No drinking, no reason.  Just time for some rest... mmm... sleep... whoa, almost took me out there.  That was not good... oh well... just remember these important things for me, friend.  Weddings, promises, and stack overflows on the ratio of what I want in humans as opposed to what they actually offer.  Tired... retiring for the night.  Master of Maddness, signing off......
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