Madd Martin L Kroeger (madd74) wrote,
Madd Martin L Kroeger

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Power Out!

First off, I realize this will be a strange entry, as it is more of a reply to a comment than an actual entry, however, I feel it important that I explore this avenue. Second, I understand in writing this, that others may take things in a personal matter, so obviously I know what I am to look forward to in my next entry. Third, yay for me in my ability to maintain a writing schedule.

This is in reply to this comment:

First and foremost, for those not familiar with Stingray, I shall explain a bit about him (consider this the "Previous on the Life of Maddness", and you hear some hot chick [or guy if that pleases you more] narrating this for you to catch up).

I met Stingray a long time ago. He is one of three "original friends" left in my life, the others being dITZ and then FiFi. We all met at the same place, Mr Wizard's, where I was a sysop (a.k.a. child porn patsy). Yes, sysop, back before there was an Internet. It was a local BBS that had two analog modem lines, so that you could call in, and possibly chat with a whole one other person. It was the greatest thing in technology that you could imagine. Well, that and ANSI/ASCII games.

Skipping a bit, after lots of chatting online, we exchanged numbers and we talked to each other every day on the phone. When I say every day I mean many times up to the point of eight hours a day. What do two "kids" talk about that long that often? Oh, his preverbal mom (and actual), games, and of course, video game singing. One day came where his mom took this 15 year old kid (citation needed) to meet this 19 year old (citation needed). I showed him my pimped up FFIV (FF II - US) game on my SNES. I had kick butt game genie codes and the like. He got to feel the true power of the pSyChO cIrCuS. Then he asked his mom if he could stay, and she said no, and I was so confused why (see picture below). That added her to my list of "your mom" attacks.

Skipping a lot, well, I had ended up losing touch with him. I moved to Capital Heights. At some point, I got this cool thing known as the Internet. Time went by more, and I attempted to find him. You would be amazed how oddly difficult it is to find a "Matt Miller" back in the days before Facebook, MyCrap, etc. To give you a picture, the time would have been around 1998 or the like (citation totally needed). Well, one day, somehow, I do not remember how, he found me. I got an email or something from him after I had sent out an email to the 700+ "Matt Miller" that I could find. While I did not find the right one, he somehow found me. Skipping more, connected, and I planned a trip to the Land of Yeast and Cheese™. My trip would be documented as follows:

(please note if you follow the link, it is the same exact thing as I am about to post... this is an exact translation, so, mind the mass of spelling errors and "strange language")

< ***** STINGRAY TRIP to LoYAC™ ***** >
It is not often I meet someone like Stingray. In fact, I see him as the younger (and hornier) version of myself! The other main difference is that he spread his roots more towards music, while I stayed towards psychology and computers. I also see myself as more of a thinker than he is, at least when it comes to conversaions. Other than that, if you removed those elements, you would never be able to tell us apart. It is a very unique quality that no one else I know shares with Madd. I was more than happy to go see him from Maddate 010524.4X to 010530.3X! There are many MANY more pictures and sounds to upload, but that is going to take a while, ha ha!! Here is how it basically went on the journey:

[010524.4X waking day]
The trip up. I almost got lost, no thanks to my mobile dying on me. Of course, Stinray has a lot to learn about giving directions, ha ha!! Had to meet at the gun shop. Tempted to buy a gun and shoot him dead, but decided not to. Gee I am nice! Went to his flavorite place to eat, Denny's. Has some strange chocolate milk fetish. We got back to his place, and I thought I was still in Iowa! Wow! It was cool, never seen a person have their place half as messy as mine, tee-hee. After a good teeth brushing, we ended up playing video games until we had to get up the next day!

[010525.5X waking day]
What DID I do this day? Well, we sang while we drove, tee-hee. Learned there is another Laser station. This one plays more Floyd than the one back home. I got to met the band "Bakkus", consisting of Jerry, lead singer and guitare player, Shawn, guitare player, Rob, crazy drum boy, and of course Stringray on bass guitare. I also met Sysaro. I apologize if I misspelled your name, but you are just a bird! Then it was off to watch them practice. This is when I actually met Rob, since we went to his house. That is where all the music toys are! Going into the next day, while on the computer, Stingray got to say hello to my Texas friend. Ha ha, that lead to more interesting things the next day!

[010526.6X waking day]
It was not easy waking him up, and it is a good thing I finally got his butt in bed! This was Stingray's first gig with 'Bakkus'. The drive finding the place was insane. Good thing I was there, or Mr. "I have no observation skills" would have driven right past Quarters, the bar we were to play at. The show was okay, it would have been better if we would have heard Jerry's voice, but the sound man did not know what he was doing. Of course, after all the beers I drank, I was not sure what I was doing either! We ended up going over to the place where Sysaro was. He would not let me eat him, hEhEhE!! Stupid bird! I was screaming left and right all over everywhere. Jerry tricked me, we did not go to Perkin's, we ended up at Denny's. It does not matter if they are closed or not, never trick a drunk Madd. Jerry learned the hard way. I ordered the Super Bird, not that I remembered half way since I asked if we had even ordered. Oh yeah, that was NOT me in the sink, that was some other beyond drunk sicko. I had the curtisy to make it in the toliet :D. When we made it back to Stingray's place, he went and showed me exactly what a real friend was. In my extremely unsober state, the last thing I requested was wanting to hear Pink Floyd. He made a PROMISE that he would take care of that, and spent two hours searching for Floyd on the net after I was already passed out! Wow!! Now that is something I do not always see in a friend. True dedication. Imagine my surpise when I woke up the next morning, hang-over free, and Numb was playing from his computer.

[010527.7 waking day]
Well, this was the second gig Stringray would play with 'Bakkus'. Before we went to the show, Stingray and I played some Gauntlet on Dreamcast over at Rob's house. That was a lot of fun! It is much different than the N64 version. This gig ended up MUCH better sound wise. Before Bakkus went to stage, there were two other bands. They were punk bands. Yeah, just wait until i get the sound clips of what Rob thinks of punk bands :D. Well, they all played "Rock You Like A Hurricane", and Bakkus was not to be stood up by that. The croud went wild when they played a short riff from that, minus Rob, who was still setting his drums up. I enjoyed recording this show and taking pictures. Everything about the band was there. It was beyond great! Expect to hear Bakkus playing on a local radio station near you soon!

It was really great spending time with Stingray. He is the only friend I know who has not passed judgement on me, ridiculed me, made fun of me (without me deserving it), or questioned who I was. He has excpeted me for who I am, and I shall always be thankful for that. So, to end the trip, it was great to get on film what started us together, music, and the wonderous place that it came from, video games. While I have many other things to upload from this trip, this is the most memorable, even if it was only hours before I had to make the sad journey back home.

So which came first, Lunar or the pSyChO cIrCuS? Ha ha, a good question. I would have to say Lunar, which is what really started it all. That was back many moons ago, like, in 1995 or so when we use to sing Lunar to each other over and over and talk on the phone for 8 hour shots at times. This was before he got into guitare.

Sting of Maddness Sting of Maddness
Sting of Maddness Sting of Maddness
</ ***** STINGRAY TRIP to LoYAC™ ***** >

The first paragraph of this "trip entry" really sums it up best. Being ten years later, I think it best to go further. Stingray is really the only person I have been at least a close friend to who I have not ever had a fight with. The closest we have ever come to anything was my second trip up there, when we were coming back from something late night, and I was talking about jamming to music (citation needed) and he was talking about being too tired or something like that. It made me sad, and I almost had a tear to my eye because I really wanted to spend time with him and jam with him and due to the schedule of my trip up there, it was otherwise not going to happen. I did not complain about it or anything, however, we ended up jamming after all. If both of us played on team sausage, or if either of us was a different gender, we would already be married. I truly have not met any human in my life, not family, not dating, not friend, not anything who connects with me as well as he does. We watch about the same in movies and TV, we have almost identical taste in music, including an absolute love for video game music. Almost everything that comes out of my fingers and mouth is understood by him, and the same in return. This is no stab at past girlfriends, or my current one. It is not a comparison, nor is it a complaint or a regret to anyone I have dated. It is not about anyone else, other than Stingray, and myself. It is to explain the extremely unique bond that the two of us have together. The ending entry from Maddate 010526.6X states it best. When I woke up, after being drunk off my mind, I heard strange music playing. It was strange in that it sounded like my computer, and I was confused, because I realized I was not in Iowa. Not only was a bunch of music on his computer identical to mine, he went out and he found some music to add to the list. He did this because when I was drunk, I apparently asked him to make a music playlist for me. I was out of it, and I passed out shortly after. Despite that, he took the time to find all this music and make sure a music playlist was made. I could have easily not remembered about it the next day. It was truly inspiring, and to this day ten years later, it still stands out as one of the more impressive things that someone I know has done for me.

Well, it would not be the only time I would visit. My next visit would intro me to Blairzilla. He is truly a unique piece of work in his own right, and I am honored to have him as a friend. I would also get a visit or two from him. My greater visit would be when my ex would throw me a surprise party, invite everyone she could think of, including Stingray and Co.

Scheduling between two busy people, throwing in a kid, would make actually hanging out near impossible. I think the track record is about a visit every two years. At some point not too long ago, a wonderful technology called emulators with netplay would come along (okay, it is actually technology that has been out for a long time, we just really started to get the grasp of it). This would allow us to play game online with/against each other. The biggest problem would be port forwarding issues, dropped connections, and lag, even though in all honesty the lag part has lead to some rather interesting points we have turned around to gut splitting humor. Reminds me of the first time I met his current girlfriend Angie and we were playing SoR3, a chunk of crap game if I may say. It was still part of our tradition, and there was a part where I saved a state right as he was about to get a smack down, and when we went to restore, he would fall down the hole every single time, and I think that the only two people in existence who could have laughed to the point of literal tears was us. No one else would have found that funny, yet, we both had an honest laughing fit. I would say you have to be there, however, really people still would not get the humor.

So changing the pace a bit, for the longest time, it had been an established routine that I play my games for the day. My games would flux from time to time, however one game had always remained the same, and that was Final Fantasy. Every day I would find at least five minutes to play, and at some point, between that and my scheduled time between my two best friends (Myles and Sparky), Stingray proposed having the same thing, which I felt was an awesome idea. I remember our first attempt was basically pitting us against technology as I was not able to port forward with my router, and he was not familiar with his. So we basically just made sure the thing worked. Even though we had done netplay a long time before, we both had different CPE, and this took a lot more effort. Our first netplay game was Secret of Mana on SNES. He has provided me some great music. He gave me an instrumental version of Time that just totally blows my socks off (when I wear them). It sounds better than a karaoke version, and people have to pay money for those. I have had some great game music created and sent my way also. I truly have been blessed with a wonderful friend. It was only some time earlier this year that I designated him as my best friend. Distance had kept me from tagging this label sooner, however one day I was thinking of the fact, he did so much to find and connect with me. Had he not done that, we would not exist together possibly. Okay, maybe not so true with the advent of Facebook. We did not talk very much due to the distance, and distance can have a bad habit of making me... distant with people without attempting to. Still, distance or not, I knew I had someone who was unique and special in my life like no other. Even my last visit would gain me a new experience, so... unique, I cannot even talk about it. ;) Oh don't worry, neither of us play for team sausage... yet.

Now that I have provided the (extended super extreme plus) background to basically today, I would like to address what is, the first and only time in a 15+ year relationship, a "rant" directed towards me in "typical bitchy girlfriend" style. It certainly is appreciated. This is one of those things where I can find the feeling towards another person, and can relate to how that feeling is.

Yes, life with my new lady is wonderful. Her cleaning may be more geared towards OCD, however, it is still a great thing for me, so yay to that.

I understand frustration, and in no way do I take the comment as a ploy on the nagging bitchy girlfriend type. I honestly deserve to hear certain things every now and then. Truth can suck to hear at times, however, it many times help put things into perspective and this is no different. There is no need to apologize and you did not come off the way you stated. Yes, we have been friends a long time, as noted in the above recap of our life together. I actually think you are the *oldest* friend I have, in terms of "seniority" (i.e., not your age, the age of our relationship). Yes, video games is what brought us to the bond we have now, even though we have found much more in common since then. The irony about setting time aside since I was doing that with FF is that I actually no longer do with FF. In fact, I have gone weeks without playing. However, that is irrelevant (me no longer playing every day). It is also not an excuse for how we have planned things and I have gotten back to you at a later time. If there is one thing I have come to truly understand, is the importance of one's time, and what happens when a person makes plans and then they get canned when you could have done something else instead. I applaud your girlfriend for recognizing this time together, and you can do more than bless her heart on my behalf. Just make sure you don't do it during Floyd, that is still a universal Maddian Code violation. You are truly lucky to be with someone so understanding. Even my girlfriend recognizes the importance of time with others, even though she truly would like to spend more time with me since I work so much, and otherwise have time with my kid. As for "more important things to do," I certainly do not look at it that way. It is like saying air is more important to one than blood. They both play a key role in maintaining the life of person.

I get this a lot, how you initiate more than I do. This is the first time I have gotten it from a guy, even though I hope all parties on the planet realize that it is just a universal problem with me, and in no way do I like it. In the same instance, it is nothing I want to ever use as an excuse. I unfortunately do not appear to have a permanent fix for it. This strange behavior is part of my life, and all I can do is continue to fight it and not give up. On that note, I am going to attempt to propose some times for us to play. Feel it is something I would rather not do? That is the furthest thing from the truth that I can think of. I understand that you feel this way, and am not telling you that you are wrong in feeling the way you do. I am simply saying, I more than enjoy the times we game together. I always have a blast, even when the technology screws us over without a reach-around, I still am basically having a great time. I know that it can be frustrating, wanting to connect, and the game always drops, or it always this or that, however, it has not ever made me feel like, "I would rather just not do it."

As you know of me, honest is who I am. When asked about something I am aware of, up front I will be.

I also want to state, I think I see a bit when your subject title was "non-mention goes to..." I think that is almost mirror to how I would react and write something of the similar. I do not think there are JOHD entries that have talked about our gaming together (even though, in my defense, I think I do not write a lot of thigns I did, or I think I wrote a lot of things I did not).

Tags: ditz, fifi, final fantasy, johd, madd was wrong, madd's world, memory, mr. wizard's, music, nina, psycho circus, psychology, stingray, video game

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