December 31st, 2005


Instability Quickie

Madd's Log, Maddate 051230.57
-sing Three Little Pigs
-sing Kyle’s Mom is a Bitch
-sing Ain’t No Pussy When She’s Gone
-return Jacy
-kiss goodnight
-return pad
-emotional instability
-not ready for bed
-forgot what emotional instability was about
-pop Jess: not that it really matters \ thinks since like Stooges like Marx Brothers
-FFIV/gba: Paladin quest complete
-2300,return pad
-Melissa over

I thought I would experiment with some songs since the rotation was going so fast.  It was not too bad, even though I kinda miss singing Bodies.  Man that song rocks my socks.  So I returned Jacy home, and once again, got a night kiss.  Something very strange and bizarre happened afterwards.  At some point before going to bed, I got this massively emotional out of control rage.  I was sad as sad could be.  The thing is, when I woke up the next day, not only was I fine, I had totally not remembered what I was sad about or what happened.  Talk about short term memory issues.  This was big.  I can only speculate at this point what happened.  I am wondering if it had something to do with Jacy.  Maybe I was hoping for more than just a kiss, and felt rejected.  It would not make any sense if that was true.  Also, it really does not feel as if that was the case.  Maybe it had something to do with being alone or something.  I have started to think that I have suppressed a lot of emotional things down, to handle living most of my life by myself.  I really am not sure what the deal is.  I do not know what happened, and think it strange I woke up as if nothing had happened.  Hmm...

So I went to work, and had some usual conversation chat with Jess.  Added was a comment on thinking I liked the Marx Brothers since I liked the Three Stooges.  dITZ would get a kick and a half hearing that one.  So afterwards, I got my weekly visit from Melissa.  She would head to the DS system as I worked on some computer issues.