October 1st, 2004


well the good news is...

... at the rate Renata is going, I shall have no problem in actually disliking her and moving on. Maybe it is part of her plan, or maybe she simpy thinks I am Jason and that she can pull this shit as if I was him. So I sent an email to her, in how I would sell my phone to her, and a few other things. She comes back with her bullshit attitude talking about how if I was going to barter the phone in the first place I should have said that. Does she not realize the email she sent? Do not ever want to talk or see you again minus the money owe, etc, etc. She sent that after I already had the phone, and I did so because I had a lot of pages I was taking off from there I wanted to keep. So she blames me, again, for a problem that was actually created by her. She tells me she is sorry she ever loved me, basically lays it down that she has no feelings for me, and THEN afterwards expects me to just GIVE her my phone, which depsite what she thinks is worth more than crap. Un flipping believable. Of course, not only do I get an email, I get a phone call telling me the same exact thing. Unbelievable.
  • Current Mood
    annoyed annoyed
ani-moo cow

so then i improve

The problem with Renata is she thinks she can use the same tactics to me as she does others, most notably, Jason. So, as a note to you humans who may be reading, I present a post just for you, to see some of what is going on.


I thought I would inform you, so you know and can keep track, that your tab turns out to $2149.00. If you would like to have my cell phone, I would sell it to you for $75 and just add it to you tab. If you do not want to buy it, I am going to put it on yahoo auctions. If I did that, I would tell you when I did, it would go on for a penny, and you could bid for it if you wish. So please let me know what you would like to do regarding that. As for the money I asked when I was there, I only asked because before you said you would write me a check, and I thought you had acquired money. I did not realize things had changed regarding that, so I apologize, that was the only reason I asked at the time. Oh yeah! If you end up getting a PS1 memory card, I would transfer your game information to it so that if you ever bought the game, you would be able to continue from where you left off. Just let me know what you would all like to do, thanks. (crap it sent it twice sorry about that it's an outlook thing)

You are really fucking sick. You take the phone away and then try to barter the bitch back to me. Ok first of all If you should have just fucking said that is what you were doing. I really cant believe that you acted this way. Just get the fucking thing to me when you can. I have been looking for it all day long.

You can think what you want. I had taken the phone and was going to give it back to you before you told me to never talk to you again, and that you basically hated me as much as you did. I would have been willing to nogotiate a price, but let's use some common sense. You say if you had not owed me money, you would not even be spekaing to me, so why in the heck should I up and just give you anything? YOU HAD NOT SAID WHAT YOU DID WHEN I TOOK THE PHONE back, hello? Are you serious? You think that is what I was really going to do? I was going to write down what I did, however, in me still having the phone I got the following:

I don't want to see, talk, or hear from you again.
Don't reply to this email cause I wont answer it. Don't call cause I wont answer the phone.
And when I do get you paid off I will stop speaking with you.
I was a fucking fool to love you or ever think that I could be with you. If I didn't owe you money I would never talk to you again.

So you can do what you have been doing, and blame this all on me you want. I am not going for your psychological games any longer. You amaze me that you think you can say all this stuff to me, and think I would just up and give you my stuff

Look Jackass I am not playing games with you cause if I was you wouldnt have shit. Stop fucking feeling sorry for your god damb self ok. I dont want you to give me the fucking thing. I will pay you for it ok. Just get the god damb thing to me soon. I have alot of shit to get done. Including go down to the school and see if the check is there so I can give YOU your money. So would you just get the fucking phone to me soon please.

I do not feel sorry for myself at all. I feel rather good today.


The fact of the matter, I actually do feel rather good. I think my chatting with JOHD last night really did me a world of good. Also, the more and more Renata talks to me and attempts to make me to be out the bad person, the more I am relieved that I found of the truth before something happened. I could have, at some point, been married to a person like this. If part X went this way, and Y went here, as opposed to what went down, I could be involved with this person. As much as I was in love and cared for her, my love for her is still like the love any human has for anyone else. It is conditional. There is really no point to let anything further said get me down, so I will not. There is no point in talking to her, for as anyone who looks at this or any other emails, any possible wrong that she could address, she absolutely avoids. The majority of the "you feel sorry for yourself", "stop acting {insert action}" could be seen as a classic example of projection. For anyone not familiar with projection, look up ego defense mechenisms on the web and you will find out how it works there. Of course, she also thinks that since things like this may get her on her own way with Jason, that it will work the same for me also. hehehe... I do not think so.
  • Current Mood
    relieved relieved