August 22nd, 2001


... and Now for Something Completely Random... 0315p

     Arrrrgggg!!  Hmm... well... it would appear that I missed you last night, I do apologize for that, JOHD.  I know how much you are into our chats together, but look at it this way.  Before in the past, when we have talked, there were like month gaps at a time.  I am not sure how a being is to understand of their past when there is month gaps in his/her history.  I am really doing my best to keep on the ball with things.  I just do not have the time at this moment to complete from Friday to today, however, I refuse to bow down to procrastination, the reason I write you now.

     A lot of things have happened since last we spoke, and almost all of it is good.  One of the best things that has been going on is a few people who were starting to slip away from my Reality have decided to rejoin me.  Some of these people I have cared for beyond a great deal.  Some of these humans have no idea how much they mean to me, and by looking at it, I do not think I realized how much they meant to me.  Almost everything in life can go by the rule, "You never know how much something means in your life until it is gone."  Well, friend, for me it goes to say that it does not even have to just leave my life.  It can start leaving my life.  I give many chances.  Some times, I think I give them more chances than I should.  I have given a few people enough... eeks!!  Hey, that is suppose to repeat.  Make it stop!  Er, I mean, make it start!  Ahhh... much better, where was I?  Oh yeah.  I have given people enough chances in the past that it allowed them "the final blow" to me before they decided to take what they wanted from me and just leave.  Usually, they take those few stable parts of me that actually glue my Reality together in a coherent ensemble of known mass.  It is like, when people take these pieces from me, that they are bringing me closer to my own DEFINED insanity, as opposed to the insanity defined by society, which I would like to add, is horridly wrong.  hEhEhE!!  JOHD, do you know how frequent the word "horrid" has been in my vocab of late?  It seems I have picked up a few words here in the past month or so.  Or, sparked up otherwise lost lingo of Maddness.  Uuuurrrggg!!!!!  My stonach just drop kicked my liver.  Must... compinsate................... (do do... do do... Red Madd is about to die... do do... dododo... dodo dodo dodo dodo dodo dodo dodo DODO DODO... use hands to open fridge for secret items... mmmm... "I-i-i-i-i-i-i l-i-k-e f-o-o-o-o-o-od!!" Red Madd has gained a level).  Gauntlet... what a crack infested game.  I keep getting inturrupted.  Where was I again again?  I scanned and saw something about blowing, hmm... oh yeah, the loss of my inner self.  Well, the thing that I look back and see on that is that to a decent few who I do give all these chances through, I get surprised and pleased.

     Oh look, Stingray is on-line chatting with me.  Blah... I forgot to put an away message up, haha, and it is Stingray, not like I am going to just let him go.  West Coast Girl also messaged me.  I told her I was leaving a while back, and techinically I did.  I was chatting with around 7 people.  hEhEhE!!  Oh yeah, that brings me to some BAD news, JOHD.  My computer is going beyond horrid.  There is a new set of issues, the latest, and worst of them, is that my computer lags.  Aye, lag, as if I was playing a net game on a 23K modem.  Only issue is, I am not playing a net game.  I am playing Windows.  Stupid Gates.  I hope he gets cancer.  Darn thief.  So everything lags.  Listening to MP3 in about anything is just wrong.  It skips as if someone were attempting to make a mix.  Arrrggg!! There it is again!  That was really horrid.  Oh, and get this.  I could be in another room, with no net connected, and it would do that.  There is only one solution at this point, and that is to format.  Unfortunately, that means there will have to be a speed up on getting the video card and the extra hard drive.  That also means there will have to be some computer down time, so, I will want to do this when I have caught up to you for sure, as well as everyone else.  Now that I think of it, I am not sure if there is an open IDE in my computer with everything I have in it.  {sigh} Maybe... just maybe, I will say goodbye to you, put my computer and every electronic in my car, in it, and then send it off a cliff and watch it EXPLODE!!  Mwahaha!!  Yeah right, like that is going to happen anytime soon.  Stupid helicopter technology!  So here is the computer run down thus far, and I am sure I am missing a few things.

- there is no way to restart or shut down my computer through Windows or any other program.  either ALT-CTRL-DEL (at times) or hitting the power switch is the way.  This makes having to reboot for installs a royal pain in the arse.

- winAmp, when minimized, will not ever show up again.  this means that I have to close it and re-open it.

- netscape mail does not allow me to delete anything without first making a new folder, deleting it, and then emptying the trash.  this is beyond a pain, since i am starting to get some spam mail in that account.

- netscape does not open up any internet sites.  i can open up local files if i use netscape to do it, however, that is about it.  thus any links in netscape mail have to be copy and pasted to a different web browser.  also, this means that i am stuck with IE for everything.

- the computer has developed a lag.  this causes massive problems when attempting to multitask, since when i move my mouse, it freezes, then unfreezes, and repeats.  chatting has become more difficult.  talking to you has become more difficult.  listening to music, and ENJOYING IT, is next to not possible.  playing Civ II is becoming more difficult.  bascially, all computer work is being effect massively by this new problem.  it is taking me more time to do everything due to this lag as well.

- when i start up the computer, a folder for 3DFX always pops up, and always in the same location.

- internet has difficulty connecting and staying connected at times.

- unable to keep computer running for long periods of time before it finally locks up, despite all the programs and effort i have put into allowing it to run longer.

So there you have it, JOHD.  The inevitable is about to be a Reality sooner than usual, because all these problems are not helping me out.  The only battle I did win was when I was using IE and kept getting blank pages.  I actually got help from a MicroCrap FAQ.  Aye, you heard me correctly.  On that note, I think I am actually going to go clean some stuff.  Crank up the Poison and hope it does not skip too much when I am away.  Not a whole lot of time before work to clean, but enough to get something done.  Down with procrastination!!  Up with Madd!  hEhEhE, I agree, it sounded wrong.  Master of Maddness, signing off 0412p......
  • Current Music
    Salamander/Life Force Boss rock remix