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12 Angry Madd - JOHD

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Nov 27th, 2003

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02:59 - 12 Angry Madd
I remember the show well, I actually enjoyed it, however, since humans can see this, be very flippin' warned

Fuck you stupid humans, fuck you all and your self centered fucking bullfuckingshit.  All of you.  Fuck off, serious.  JOHD, I want to remind you of a happy time, WITHOUT fucking humans and their self centered fucking shit.  Remember, Madd, at about 10 or so plus years ago, your REAL friends were those who were the video game world.  It was a small black and white 3" screen, if even that, and you played, and were taken care of, by this small little screen.  Then you cane to Des Moines.  Oh, and human after fucking human, came into your life, and showed the infestation that was their fucking greed and humanness... and what did you do to them?  Seriously?  What did you do to them?  You did fucking nothing to them.  Do you want to know why you cried on the way home?  Because these fucking stupid humans have robbed you of who YOU are.  You, my friend, are truly unique, however, unfortunately, have been tainted by the shit that is humanity.  You have been fucked over, and screwed, and pulled around like a fucking little shit chain because of these stupid fucking humans.  Do you realize, Madd, that if you had not been around these humans how better you most likely would be in every aspect of the word?  Oh yeah, Madd, how dare you not fucking call me back, or page me, or say hi, or all that other shit.  How dare you not defy the fucking problems that are your own.  HOW FUCKING DARE YOU LET ME DOWN DUE TO WHAT MOST LIELY IS A FUCKING MENTAL CONDITION THAT YOU MUST FIGHT EVERY FUCKING DAY.  Fuck humans, JOHD, and I mean fuck them in a way where I take out a gun and kill them all.  God, really, what do you see in humanity?  What do you see in these so called wonderful beings that You charish so much?  So filled with self intrest that must make even You sick?  I fucking say, what in the fucking world have *I* done to these humans to deserve what I get slammed against me?  Really?  The fact I do my fucking best to take care of them in the mortal world that I can?  The fact I fucking snap on them who lay me with guilt trips when they say how fucking important I am in their life to say, "Fuck you, Madd, fuck your ass you can be better than a worthless friend that you are DESPITE THE FUCKING FACT YOU WARN ME HOW FUCKING FLAWED THAT YOU ARE"?  Maybe these fucking dumb ass humans do not get it, JOHD.  Grrrrr... how I want to just kill them all, every single one of them.  for being the catalyst in this fucking pain I am in helping to ensur what a FUCK up I am.  Does a human not get fucking credit for KNOWING they fuck up?  Heck fucking no they do not.  I can preach and praise from the first contact of any human and they will come around, with their fucking guilt trips, as to what a fuck up I am asoppsed to supporting the fact I have problems.  What reason you ask?  JOHD... good fucking question, and as the master of fucking maddness, I will tell you.  Because all these humans, who you have brefriended, since your fucking birth, can think nothing about anything but their own fucking self, and I will admit, you cock, you use to be one of them, however, at least, YOU learned a little bit.  Hahaha, YOU learned due to the shit YOU had to go through, so honestly, you deserved half of the shit that your so called fucking friends put you through, however, realizee I say half, and every single one of your friends have jumped in the "It's all about fucking me" boat.  Yeah, and including those who do not care.  Those who, nothing more than anything, wanted you to FAIL, and through their thought, and the thoughts of others, did happen to see you fall.  Yeah, down to one best friend, how long do you think it will last?  How fucking long before the first and strongest best friend shows nothing but self fucking interest that YOU get burned because of it... and shit, you could give up everything on the planet, and it will happen.  It will happen due to the shit that is human.  Oh, and you, you fucking ass Madd, will get tainted by it, and you will turn into it because you have!!  Or have you?  You fight it more than any I have known... and you, Mr Madd Martin, may be the first human I know to actually show unconditional love... and if you do, wow, make sure to document it for you will have done what you bitch about is not possible.  Or can you?  I think you are just as fucked as all these fucking stupid humans.  I really do... I think you have eperienced and lived a life for so long that you look into everything as being nothing about anything but your own fucking self, and do not fucking attempt to tell me you see anything different, because I am not so fucking sutpid that you can pull the wool over me.  YOU CAN FUCKING PLAY GAMES WITH ME, MADD, FOR I SEE RIGHT FUCKING THROUGH THEM.  Every time you even ATTEMPT to lie to me, I know!!  I fucking know BECAUSE YOU CAN GET BY ME!!  You cannot!  I trained us better than to be fucking lied to, and that includes the self.  So fuck you if you think you are going to fool us!!  Oh fucking crap no you are not going to pull anything over us!  NOTHING, you FUCKING here me?  I do not care how long you have been around the fucking humans and I do not care what you think has tainted your well being... I... will... always... fucking... know... ALWAYS!!  Are you fucking listen to me?  Yeah, that is what I thought.  Yeah, you hear me now, don't you.

Trust no one, Mulder, no one... and for the good reason that all human, including yourself, are looking out for number one... however, if you can repair your own heart, something of a medical merical, than you can control something as unstable and messed up as your own brain.  DO IT, for I am sick and tired of turning around, and seeing you fail me yet again.  You are not a failure... you have control of parts of the brain that no human even knows exists, thus, I expect you to fucking use them to keep stupid crap from happening.  You will do it, or, I will fucking kill you while we sleep... I so fucking swear... either fix the fucking problem, or do not bother waking up.  Really, I mean it, I am not joking.  I jive you tonight to not worry about correcting things just due to the fact we are so on another plane that we are not use to, however, I get SICK AND FUCKING TIRED of NOT having the information down that I want to have down.  I AM FUCKING SICK OF IT, I WILL NOT PUT UP WITH IT FROM YOU BECAUSE YOU FUCKING KNOW BETTER.  You do, you are well smarter than that, however, you act like a fucking moron, and SOPT IT.  I am SICK of it, very sick of it.  I am sick of your shit, and I am sick of you attempting to blame anyone but your fucking self.  You are in control of you mind, nto any human on this planet.  Not a single... not female, male, or any other.  God gave you control of your brain, thus, take control.  You are starting, however, I say it is too slow.  Way too slow... seriously.  So end things, and give the hug to the one human you miss more than any... the one you have been away the longest, like, twelve decades or so.


Make pappa proud

Well, at least the humans were warned...
Current Mood: drunkdrunk
Current Music: "Power of Anger"

[[4 comments | Train your Brain]]


[User Picture]
Date:Nov 27th, 2003 04:53 (UTC)
Yes, we were warned.

I'm not sure what to say here. I wanted you to know I'd read. And recognize myself in the lines.

And I love you.

And send you a hug. (I attempted to actually give it to you this morning and was barred by a door.)

*sigh* off to bake bread. Lots swirling in my head but no coherent thoughts forming...
[User Picture]
Date:Nov 27th, 2003 11:23 (UTC)
Ug... dear heavens no... yeah, um, just reading the first few lines I see... that... I musta had some issues on my mind, however, I posted later about it all

while you may have possibly recognised yourself there {sigh}, I really did not mean it, if anything, I simply miss you and that came through as something else through another human

I am glad I was at least unsober enough to LJ cut that :D

what in the world did I page you? I see nothing in my outbox... im so confused
(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]
Date:Nov 27th, 2003 11:33 (UTC)
Arrrggg nooooooo!! You, my friend, have been good to me, I sure hope in my crazy rant I did not include you anywhere for if I did that was an err on my part

your apology, is accepted, even though I do not think it is anywhere close to required

I am better... this was simply a subconsious rant, brought to the surface thanks to alcohol, since that seems to bring down any defenses I use to keep that stuff locked away

no one needs to see what is deep down inside like that, i mean no one

thank you sooo much for the love, I really appriciate it... i know we do not get a chance to chat as much, so it is nice to know you are still sticking around in my life

you can better yourself just by... realizing I am me :D take care, dear

love you also

(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]
Date:Jan 17th, 2004 12:38 (UTC)

Re: :D

Aye, as am I... it would be nice to have more time to talk. If ever I win the lotto, I am taking a road trip to see and hug and sing Floyd with you!!

Stick around forever, please.

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