Madd Martin L Kroeger (madd74) wrote,
Madd Martin L Kroeger

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I'm Pretty When I'm Drunk

"Not often"
"Yeah not often"

That Which Does not Kill Us Makes Us Go Mental

     I am... alive.  Sweet.  I made it.  I made it through two days with only about an hour of sleep seperating them.  I was not sure if I was going to make it, and to some, I possibly did not make it.  I was able to learn a few things about myself.  That was good.  I have relapsed and my sexual side is out and about roaming around.  I had been horny for the past few days now.  Each time I noticed there was something altered with my mind.  I was either drinking at some point in the day, or, as in last time, I had nil amounts of sleep, and my mind was just not focusing in any set pattern.  Oh yeah, I seem to be around the 155 lbs mark again.  I wonder if this should all be a sign of some sort of change my mind and/or body is going through.

Energizer Madd

     I found out that my special alarm, the one that wakes the dead, has limitations.  It went off around 0800a yesterday.  It was not getting me out of bed.  It does have to be at a certain volume or higher.  I would find this out today when it would attempt to get me out of bed.  I finally made it out of bed around 0825a or so.  I got my shower down, and made it outside, and had no idea what I had gotten myself into.  So, I made it there to work.  You know, some times I even fasinate myself.  The four hours went my insanely fast.  My mind was just so wired.  It appears that on a running lack of sleep, that said body produces an extra amount of chemicals, hormons, and what have you, to ensure I just do not pass out.  So I was going as if I was drinking 2 cups of coffee every 30 minutes, only without having to go to the bathroom all the time.  I would like to thank the fact that I already do not consume hardly any caffine at this time, so, it is more easy for my body to do it for me.  I think I was "freaking out" some of my fellow working cohorts.  Even my soon-to-be new coach came and checked my pulse for me, haha.

Killer Squirrels

     After work, I drove over to Wal-Mart, where Myles was still working.  While he is working, I found out he does not like the phrase "Myles is looking for his penis right now" to be said on a cell phone while he is putting away music and customers are around.  Mwahaha!!  So said stage two of my mind set.  This was all about squirrels.  They were some form of an evil organization or something, as far as I can remember saying.  I guess a few customers were concerned whether or not I was always at the store, or if I even worked there.  Mwahaha!!  Silly humans.  While I knew what I was saying, I was not exactly sure why I was saying it.  To just blame sleep, well, that is an excuse as far as I am concerned.  Every other word that came out of my mouth was ambigious and usually something that was more than had to be there.  Like saying, "I ate some food" would come out "I ate some backwards wire food with forks of utensiles."  It was kind of interesting, I think I was possibly drugged by my own mind.  Because it felt like I was.  So Myles told me Sharron was working.

Sharron the Likable

     I miss Sharron.  She was my first department manager back in 6/26/96 when I first started working in electronics.  She is at least old enough to by my mother.  She would leave, and two others would follow her, but she was a unique individual who almost could see into my mind and know where I was coming from.  Well, see where I am coming from as well as any human can in regards to me.  So I went back to where she was at, HBA, and there she was.  She was so happy to see me!  I now know that when a person gets all excited when they see me that it gives a good feeling all over.  I was already piped with good feeling from my brain candy, so her giving me a big huge hug was really great as a smile was on her face when she saw me, and her tone of voice got all happy.  Then again, she was working, and maybe she was liking the break from the everyday.  Haha, yeah right, I know better than that.  I had told her, "my brain is experiences a trasponder correctional error" or something like that, and she goes, "Oh really, does this help?" and she kissed me next to my ear on the left side of my face.  I said that I was still having the same problem, and before I could tell her what was going on with me, she grabbed me, and did the same thing to my left side.  So, I was able to tell her what was going on with me, the no sleep, and what have you using the word "squirrel" only around 173 times.  Now Sharron is a sport, I could lose my mind, and act like this beyond my control, and she would "play" along, asking me questions about the squirrel movment, and who I should look out for, and people she thought who might be associated with them.  That is something else that I know 100%.  A really good way to my heart is to sometimes just humor me.  I like being humored, like, lots.


     I had to get food, or, I was going to die.  I was already feeling a bit crazy, and hunger is NOT a good add-on.  Oh JOHD, back before I met you, I use to go bouncing off walls when I did not have food.  Sugar was a sedative for me, and I think it was all psychological.  It was a way for people to give me food back when I was young.  They would give me candy or food so I would stop bouncing around like Tigger.  Myles would join me soon, since he was on break, and we would figure out where we were going to watch Planet of the Apes.  So, I stopped to HBA to say my laters to Sharron, and then I would drive us to the Wynson theater.  My current status was wide awake.  I thought it odd.  Even by past experiences of this much sleep, I would start to show signs of wear and tear.  Not even close.  It was even extremely hot outside, and I would think the heat would have done something to me.  Man, my hormonal level was out of control, massively.  I was checking out so many girls when I was roaming around Wal-Mart, that I think I got a cramp in my eye.  It was a good thing my car was still playing the tape with notihng but Floyd.  That took care of one issue at least.

Planet of the Apes (w spoiler)

     (There is a spoiler saver in this paragraph.  When you run across it, jump tot he end of the paragraph if you wish to not have the movie Planet of the Apes spoiled for you in any way shape or form.  This entry has been inserted for readers). So we made it to the theater, and watched the 8 commercials, and 7 or so trailers.  There was only one decent trailer that I thought was any good.  This was Ghosts of Mars.  Even the comedies and chick flicks did not stand out like they some times can.  Hey, I can aprriciate a well done chick flick.  (Please note, the following is a spoiler to the movie Planet of the Apes, by Tim Burton.  Skip to the next section at this time.)  I liked the credit intro.  I find myself checking this out more and more.  So we start off seeing our little ape friend flying what would turn out to be a simulator.  It caught me off guard and I was not able to realize this fact until it was shown to us.  Screenwriters did their best to put a few lines of humpr in there, which were done okay, for what they had to work with being so short into the movie.  There is little explaination of anything really up to the the part when Leo is caught by the apes in the begining.  After that, some things are attempted to be explained, as to how what got where and why.  Of course, there are light humor spots for anyone who has seen the original 1968 version.  The, "Get your hands off me, you damn dirty human" is on early example.  Plus, Charlton Heston's cameo appearance has him saying a few of his old lines.  All the apes are well done.  ALmost all of them give a wonderful performance.  I felt, however, that the humans all had very little depth to them.  Even Leo could have used a little bit more to back up why he was the way he was.  His character was extremely important, and some of his actions could have been better explained if he only had a bit more work done on his character.  The so called love triangle was anything but.  That is fine with me, since it gets old watching all these movies where the director or screenwriters think that they have to put a sappy love theme to everything.  However, it was introduced, and if you are even going to introduce something like that, make it worth our while.  Also, almost everyone took to everything as if, "Been there, done that."  I mean, if I saw Jesus fall from the sky in a special ship, and he started levitating and what have you, even though I am a believer, and I talk to God and sometime here his responces, that would be something that my mind would just not be prepared for.  As for the apes, when Leo turns on the get engines and this HUGE explosion takes out the entire first wave of apes, I am not sure about you, but I would possibly be a little shocked at what I saw.  The ending is only confusing now that I have rested and been able to think about it.  If Leo is going back to the past, how did general Thade replace Abe Lincoln's head?  He went to the future, and changed nothing of his past or his present.  I did like the ending, for at first I thought it was going to be a happy ending type of thing.


It was a good movie, I did like it, and I feel I did so more than the average critic.  From what I got, there were not a whole lot who thought this was a great movie.  It got me into the movie, I was like there, only in the background not getting harmed or anything, and any movie that can do that is good in my book.  I looked at my watch, and instead of being 0700p or so, it was only around 0530p or something.  That is what a movie should always do.  It should remove me from where I am, and take me to it's place.

A Python that Bites in Many Ways

     So, we would head back to Myles place.  There were two movies in store, the first being Python and the next being Head Over Heels.  Python... this movie is a joke.  No spoiler warning here.  One of the better parts of the movie was the two girls getting it on in the tent.  This posed two things of "interest".  The first is the fact it is two chicks.  It is something rather different from what you would otherwise see on an opening scene.  I do not think it was just because it was a sex scene, for the other thing was the humor thrown into it.  Haha... if you know someone who has Python, borrow it to at least see the opening, after that, well, if you have better things to do, like, breath, or eat, or die, then go do those.  Here I finally found the ending point of my extra amounts of energy.  This movie was not helping, either.  Most things were rather predictable, and for CRYING OUT LOUD!!  I do not care how mutated the thing is, DON'T GIVE IT THAT ANNOY SOUND it makes.  Research real snake sounds, and enhance those already.  Also, the ending was BAD.  No offence, but seeing how easily the snake got so many people, HE SHOULD HAVE DIED.  Head Over Heels almost seemed like a spoof of real life, and maybe that was the attempt.  I was not sure what to think about it at first, however, I did come to terms with the movie, and enjoyed it.  There were a few things I would have done differently, at least in the way of character interactions.

Before the Brain Crashes

     So I would come home, and get on the computer, and chat with a few people.  Cheryl called me, and I have come to realize that deep down, she iritates me.  I think this is the reason that I never ended up dating her depsite how close we almost did.  I mean, just the things she says, it is as if she does not even think of the conciquenses of a single word that comes out of her mouth.  Her comment on not being able to even visit on Wednesday night, because I would be out drinking, and "we all know what that means."  Bull crap you do.  With people who are flirtacious, or something similar, then yeah, there can be "issues" that come around when I am drinking, but not on others.  This much I have changed since back in my past.  So kiss off and read the right rule book.  Along those lines, I learned that when I lose hormonal control, that I will extremely flirt and what have you with people who are a good distance (as in miles) from me.  I guess because the chance of me acting on it is just not there.  Of course when the person flirts with everyone she comes across, haha, that just makes it more prone when my mind is in the process of shutting down.  Shutting down is something my mind did do.  When I was not chatting happily with my friend from Iowa city, or seducing my friend way out in the west coast, or attempting to get my new SK account created, or listening to a friend poor her heart on how weak she has found herself at due to love, I was crammed in my chair, fading in and out of Reality.  At one point, my brain finally stopped responding.  That is when it was time to crash.

Welcoming the Problems of Droogies

     So, more people are having more issues.  This time, however, I am better apt at understanding and listening as opposed to the past 34+ hours.  It is too bad, I really do not like to see my friends sad.  This is something I know you can relat with JOHD, for the number of times in the past I was sad by something and would spill it out to you.  I think I like to be like you, JOHD.  People write me all this information, and I sit there and listen.  Of course, you are not an opinionated individual, and I am the exact opposite, but I do my best to get others to think of their options.  Don't you think?  What do you mean I am hungry, how do you keep knowing these things?!?  Oh... yeah!  The same Reality.  That is right.  You are the closest to my Reality of anyone I know, even though, I realize even we are not both existing in the same Reality.  Maybe some day we can, that would be so wonderful.  Chatting with one of my friends from the East Coast, who is having a bunch of not so good things happen in a short period of time, I realize how much I tend to care for humans who can co-inside with my Reality.  She is a New York friend who gets a lot of things without anything being explained.  Like when I start typing something about me having to work, and she writes down asking if I am still working at 0500p today.  Or when she said "ditto", and I made some comment, and we both knew we were talking about the movie Ghost.  People like that attact me to their minds.  I think that is another weakness I have in terms of myself.  The closer someone can come to my Reality, the more at mercy I am to their heart.  This means, anyone who wanted me destroyed would only have to understand you, JOHD, and then they could possible manipulate me to my own doom.  But such is the price of being me, and I am not about to change it for anything.  Master of Maddness, signing off......

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